Sad days in the St.Jagged household!!!

St.Jagged entering a NHS hospital to visit his mum, St.Jagged left alive, MUM / RIP another MRSA victim !!!!

Convicted Rumanien nurse last seen working in NHS hospitals feeding dying OAP's!!

MRSA kills more OAP's than Hitler stuck in Auschwitz!!!

Sad news from the St.Jagged household, no muvva fuckers, WAN-KIN-DIK is still here and the rest of St.Jaggeds faithful readership, his upside down swimming, dead goldfish, mingy dog and flea-ridden, non-corrupt, non-voting Persian/Iranian cat!

No Jaggedone's St.Jagged has lost a very dear person and she is now in the safe hands of another very dear member of the Jagged family flying freely somewhere between our shithole planet and wherever they want to be "Two little birds"

Anyway whilst going through the ordeal of losing this very dear person St.Jagged was confronted with several not so pleasant TRUTHS regarding GB, NHS Hospitals and to get rid of all of the frustrations St.Jagged wrote a couple of poignant Spoofs over at the http://www.thespoof.com/ site.

They are coming up below and if any one of you has lost a close relative lately, my deepest condolonces go out to you all!!!

Enjoy the Spoofs, smile, laugh, but also spare a thought for all of those reaching the end of their lives in hospitals, especially OAP's. In this modern day and age they are not being treated with the respect that they deserve and St.Jagged hopes that his satirical spoofs will at least ring a few bells!!!

Spoof 1)

The very cheapskate NHS has been rocked once more by an even bigger scandal than their recently reported cheap foreigner employment policies! What could be worse? MRSA, the killer bug, which takes care of more OAP's than Hitler ever did at Auschwitz!

News has leaked (at a very leaky NHS!) out from CEO boardrooms that the killer MRSA bug is not quite what OAP punters forced into NHS hospitals think it is, an unavoidable KILLER! A recent infiltration exercise by the intrepid CIA (cockroach infiltration army) has found evidence that the MRSA bug was purposely released in hospitals to drastically cut costs, waiting lists, save beds and increase CEO bonuses!OAP's, especially the female species, delivered into hospital with a simple broken leg, arm, toe or finger have been increasingly exiting the backdoors in coffins. Good business for the hospitals, funeral parlours and great news for the LABOUR GOVERNMENT!

The very brave CIA reporter, "King-Roach Pussywound" also infected by the MRSA bug after licking the blood of a MRSA infested dying OAP, (luvely, jubbely!) sent this very disturbing and shocking report over to CIA headquarters:

Dr.Death (better known as that rat, NHS, CEO, Boris Genocidski) divulged at a board meeting with his lesser DR.Deaths the superb figures for 2008/09.

"After the introduction of MRSA we are pleased to announce that especially OAP's are "popping off" with rapid haste! Everbody is profiting, Funeral Directors, the Labour Government, CEO's and also, NHS costs have been slashed by 35%."

"This means we can all pay ourselves even larger bonuses and kid the world that we and the Labour Party are all doing a fucking grand job!"

CIA reporter "King-Roach Pussywound" just managed to relay this horrendous report before being trod on by a certain CEO with his handmade designer 400,00 pound shoes, spreading puss all over the pristine polished oak floor and finally being put out of his misery.

The unnamed CEO cynically laughed and quoted:"Well this mother fucker certainly reminds me of our OAP customers and their relatives downstairs, who don't have a fucking idea about our murderous, deadly MRSA policies."

Thank God "King-Roach Pussywound" had the brains to leave his hidden microphone on: Jaggedone and his CIA reporters have sworn to "get the Mother fuckers!!!"

For further developments keep tuned to Aljazeera International, they at least sometimes attempt to reveal the TRUTH!

Spoof 2)

The latest scandal to rock the NHS and Labour Party has been reported and exclusively divulged via Jaggedone's CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) to the world after an investigation into racist Hospital employment practices. CIA special health and medical reporter, Daddy "Filthylonglegs" Unwashedhands, sent the following, harrowing report back to CIA headquarters after creeping through the disgusting bog pipes of a certain mortuary in a certain hospital and uncovered the following racist facts:

a)No white or Brit nurses were to be found working in any of the departments.

b)All "Daddy" could hear was the mumbo-jumboing of African/foreign nurses and Doctors in pigeon English whilst talking to their Brit patients/relatives, who couldn't understand a fucking word what they were on about!

c)Only in the CEO/Management departments was decipherable English being spoken and white caucasian faces detected.

d)After scouring through "Top Secret" documents, "Daddy" found the following documented criteria pertaining to employment conditions, here we go:

1) No white, British applicants will have a chance of employment in the NHS, they should all fuck off to America!

2) Only coloured/non-Brit white i.e. Polish, Rumanien, etc shall be given opportunities of employement in the NHS, reasons: They're cheap, nasty and don't give a shit about patients/relatives feelings, hence no more time consuming emotional bullshit and an immense cutting of time and costs!

3)By employing non-Brits we the NHS have cut waiting lists to a minimum and nobody has noticed that the services on offer are appalling (apart from white, caucasian dying OAP's who are rapidly vacating their beds, ask yourself why!).

4)NHS CEO's and Management and will remain solely in British hands, hence the justification to pay enormously, inflationary salaries. White Brit nurses/doctors are planning protests and strikes, but the NHS don't give a shit because they have the backing of the Labour Party and their white caucasian Prime Minister, real Scot, Gordon Brown, who believes in racial equality as long as he doesn't have to be treated at NHS shitholes!!

Daddy "filthylonglegs" Unwashedhands scarpered out of this certain hospital and relayed this shocking report back to CIA headquarters who in turn has sent it post-haste to the All-Black, Notting Hill Carnaval Organisation Commitee. They have promised to build a protest float in honour of the unemployed, white, Brit caucasian nurses and doctors as a show of solidarity and proof that RACISM ISN'T DEAD BY NO MEANS, MAAN!!

Israel demand Auschwitz conditions for the brand new Palestinia!!!

JA, JA, Jaggedones, St.Jagged has made a massive coup de gras (what the fuck is that!?) he sent his CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) under the leadership of ol WAN-KIN-DIK behind the scenes at the press conference of the Israeli Prime Minister but what his Numero Uno Cockroach star reporter "Adolfo Eichmann Hilter" recorded was totally different to what the world was told.

WAN-KIN-DIK waiting in his panzer recorded the following statement exclusively for the Jaggedone's readership, don't be fucking shocked, it's not the TRUTH, this time, but nearly!

Israeli Prime minister Netanyahu proudly announced to the world that they are willing to accept a Palestinian State as their neighbours under the following conditions:

1) The new Palestinian state is to be built behind barbed wire, search lights, a massive Berlin wall and security towers patrolled by the Israeli SS.

2) Exit from Palestinia is allowed only by air and with El Al Airways, no Untermenschen will be allowed to set foot on the "Promised Land" without chemical cleansing.

3) Security gates built for Israeli forces to enter Palestinia and sort the Bastards out will have the following, historical words written over them: ARBEIT MACHT FREI.

4) All food, medical supplies, fresh water, electricity and other energy resources must be solely provided by Israel and sold to the Palestinian Pigs for extortionate prices.

5) Any weapons found in the new Palestinia will be a reason for Israel to enter, whip the bastards, teach them a lesson, bomb them with white phosphorus, rapidly retreat and leave the shithole in an even worst condition than it was before.

6)Protests, rebellions, Hamas, Al Qaeda, Palestinian Freedom Fighters must be eradicated and all young men between 14 and 35 will be put against the wall and executed.

Many more conditions were demanded and accepted by the US/UN and Prime Minister

Netanyahu finished with the following closing statement:

Hopefully when these demands have been met and implemented, within 5 years there will be no Palestinians left anyway and we can all live in peace at last.
The Prime Minister sent greetings to US President Obama, who smiled from ear to ear and thought silently "at last my world vision is beginning to take shape with one less problem to worry about! Shalom!

Jaggedone's when and where will it all end, hopefully not in St.Jagged's back fucking garden or yours!!!

Shalom and Aufwiedersehen from St.Jagged, his CIA and newly promoted officer of his CIA, Chief Chink Cockroach WAN-KIN-DIK !!

Holland beat England in their own backyard at the ancient game of CRICKET, whatever next, Nessie will be sighted!!!

It's only fucking cricket W.G. Grace, don't turn in your grave!

Howzat, Jaggedone's, how the fuck is zat!! No oh faithful one's St.Jagged hasn't gone completely stark raving loony, but nearly!!

As if its not embarrassing enough being a very proud Brit and having to suffer the indignities that our super, overpayed, loser, sportsmen/women pour upon us, no fucking no! St.Jagged just happens to reside in Holland, that insignificant country of Shell, Van gogh, super footballers, coffee, cheese, crap rugby players and cricketers.


Wel they certainly stuffed the mother land of cricket right up their butts and had William.G. Grace turning in his very fucking ancient grave!! (see above!)

OK, Jaggedone's we all know about English footie players, they couldn't win the World/European cups even if they were given to them! ("wouldn't be fair ol chap," stiff upper lip bullshit!)


Rugby, Athletics, Boxing, Tennis, etc, you name it, the Brits are completely useless at it!


St.Jagged will now name some major (my butt!) sports where the Brits excell:


Marbles = fuck off

Darts = Only when a certain Dutchman (again!) Mijnheer Barneveld is not playing!

Fox Hunting = no other country on the planet wants to play that barbaric sport!

Hooliganism = World champions together with Poland (bunch of Skinhead morons).
World Champion hooligan "Larry the Leeds United Thug" winning the world cup final against Kraut "Boris Boom Boom Smashyourkopfin"

Kicking Old age Pensioners = three times world champions, respect muvva fuckers!!

Rowing at Henley = Only possible winners because only posh aristocrat bastards are allowed to play with themselves + champers ducky!

University boat race = Oxford (full of Yanks) Cambridge ( full of more Yanks) don't count, foreign bastards, disqualified!

Snail racing = 5 x times world champions beat the French (YES!) only because they insist on eating their best racers, failing to finish every time!
GB snail winning world championships, fuck me he's got an orange hat on, Dutch bastards!

Pitbull fighting = 10 x world champions, only US has more titles to its belt but has now been banned, all champion pitbulls smuggled into the UK, hence 5 x winners at last!

Racing cockroaches = 10 x times second behind India, reason: England taught them all they know and the fucking ex Raj bastards now beat them hands down, breeding, breeding and even more breeding! (too many cockroaches in India, what else is new!)


Anyway Jaggedone's, we once proud losing English are now praying that the fucking Krauts get stuffed by Lichtenstein at footie, then we can have a massive laugh at our old enemies:


Chance of that happening are the same as England winning the World Cup in sunny ol Zuid Afrika (+ apartheid!) 5000/1, St.Jagged is now taking bets so be fucking quick, and if England win it, St.Jagged will commit hari kari at the centre court of Wimbledon, yet another English loser!!!

Goodbye Jaggedone's, see you over at the http://www.thespoof.com/ site for more very, spooky, Jagged adventures, by the way St.Jaggeds ol Chinky slave WAN-KIN-DIK has entered the footy World Cup singlehanded, after slaughtering the ravaging Persian armies, corrupt NY CEO's, Talibans and Al Qaeda he will represent the Falkland Islands and thump the fucking English off of the planet, once and for all!!

St.Jagged fights for the freedom from slavery of Indian Dalits

My Asian Jaggedone"s should take the following blog with a pinch of rancid shit and be shocked at the horrendous truth behind the story.

Of course St.Jagged slightly altered the report to at least attempt to raise a cynical, humourous awareness of the plight of these very poor bastards. What else should ST.Jagged do, cry into his veggy curry!

After observing the plight of the Dalits you begin to realise that St.Jagged could well be telling the fucking TRUTH and the world is full of crap!

Well enjoy it and think deeply about your visit and complaint about the next pristine clean motorway bog, while the Dalits in Mumbai have to share one shithole amongst 800!!!

Here we go the title is:

Indian lowest cast Dalits given publicity by the Beeb for their luxury lifestyle!

Another superb "Beeb" roving reporter gave the world an insight on BBC World, into the Indian cast (slave) system and proved that the slavedrivers are acting in a "humane" and correct way.
"Dalits are happy with their "Karma", and should be forced into modern - day slavery otherwise they would all end up in the shithole slums of Mumbai, amongst the human excrement, rubbish and squalour," they proclaim.
The Slavedrivers (or higher cast landowners) offer a pristine clean, working environment, healthy meals (rice, rice and even more rice) supplemented by luxury rat meat. Contrary to filthy slum living with 800 people utilising one toilet, sewer rats, and a constant flow of human SHIT and disease.
Dalits wishing to escape slavery should think twice before rushing off to the shitholes of Bombay, at least they can breathe the fresh air of country life and fulfill their Karma decently, albeit with a whip up their backsides!
The "Beeb" reporter acting humbly sampling a 5***** country rat menu said "umm, delicious, tastes just like chicken and free of any sewerage leftovers like those other stinking rats swimming in the crap of Mumbai."
Superb reporting and an excellent insight into an "alternative lifestyle"." The Beeb alongside the Sri Lankan (experts at package holidays to revolting places!) and Indian tourist boards are actually thinking of starting package hols. to the Dalit areas hoping that their "way of life" attracts global attention, makes the rich landowner bastards even richer and keeps the "muy pobre" Dalits in their fucking place!
Jaggedone refused to send his CIA (cockroach infiltration army) to the area to discover the "TRUTH", the dangers of infection and disease for his intrepid Cockroach reporters was too risky!

Loony/Corrupt Damian Hirst send him off to the starving millions in Africa/Art for Arts sake!

Ja, Ja, Ja-ggedones, he's back quicker than you all thought, reasons:

St.Jagged saw a documentary on the fab BEEB, better known as the BBC, and it got right on his almighty fucking nerves!

The docu. followed the steps of a bungling, crap reporter trying to infiltrate the world of contemporary art, gallerists, auctioneers, and most important that fab, trendy artist, Damien Hirst, what a massive tosser he is!

Hirst, multi billionaire crap/shocker painter along with corrupt auctioneers, Sotheby's, Christies and his gallerists manipulate the prices of Hirst's shitty works and other well known contemporary artists too. Keeping their prices at astronomical levels and flogging their shit to the deaf, dumb, blind and very rich and famous multi-billionaire, trend-setty fraternity, manipulating and corrupting the system on the way!

St.Jagged had seen enough when these lumps of banal art (shit) were being sold for amounts, which could feed a starving African nation for a year, and ended up on the walls of some banal mega-rich bullshitters who find it necessary to have the crap hanging on their walls, they should be sent post-haste in the direction of a shit-hole shanty town in downtown Congo and invest their worthless billions decently!

Have a read, have a laugh, and think about the waste of money being thrown down the throats of Mr "Devilish" Damian and his cohorts, FUCK OFF ALL OF YOU!!

Here we go:

A very cutting documentary has been released about Damian Hirst, his gallerists, the auctioneers, the contemporary art world generally and how the fuck they all manipulate the astronomical prices of their so called works of very crappy, contemporary art.
The nosy, toss of a reporter was sometimes even refused entrance to many auctions of Hirsts superior art (my butt!). But the Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach infiltration Army) never failing to miss a piece of arty farty scandal, promptly sent there superstar art-reporter "Vinny Van Cock" behind the scenes to pick up some scandal and info about how these mega-rich morons take the piss out of us all, here his report:
Damian knows his "art" is absolute crap but certainly does know how to shock the public very well, manipulate and force the prices of his crap sky-high.
Golden cows, sharks, Jesus in urine, stubbed out dog-ends, diamond skulls, butterfly bullshit, you name it devilish Damian flogs it. He even has the audacity to let others make his crap works of art for him and then puts his mega-rich signature on the bottom.
Other lower league contemporary artists practise the same thing, produce crap and flog it to deaf, dumb, blind mega-rich morons. Their gallerists and auctioneers also manipulate the prices so keeping the mega-crap artworks priced at astronomical levels. 30 million bucks for a single coloured canvas, not even a real artist like Vincent Van Gogh could achieve that!
Anyway our intrepid reporter "Vinny Van Cock" passed all of the corrupted info over to that tosser reporter (Daily "Scrap" Mail) waiting in his "cool" very gay, pink Bubblecar.
Damian and his morons will obviously continue to earn billions, the ignorant public will continiue to flock to the museums admiring a piece of horses manure plonked in the corner, "Oh golly, how wunderbar Darling, we must have it."
In the mean time superstar CIA reporter, "Vinny Van Cock" has six-legged it off with a real piece of art under his gut, a Picasso, worth peanuts compared to the "oh so fabby" devilish Damian's crap!

St.Jagged warned you Muvva Fuckers, now swallow it!

Back home at fucking last, a very tired St.Jagged and his very limp, half-starved Chink, WAN-KIN-DIK have returned home after travelling the cyber waves, soaking up fame and notoriety in an effort to get the TRUTH across to the billions of ignorants inhabiting this very sad planet and they still don't fucking listen!! Here a few examples:

Most Brit MP's have been claiming outrageous expenses and now an independent control body has opened a corrupt "Can of Worms" leaking stories of unbelievable abuses of expense claims.

Shamed MP's now have either to pay back the illegally claimed, tax payers money or get the fucking "JACK-BOOT" up their butts and leave their highly, over-payed jobs, aah!

Well muvva fuckers, whats new? St.Jagged has been warning you bunch about VOTING for these arseholes, and now the inevitable TRUTH is coming out, you all put them there and you tax-payers deserve every lump of corrupt shit that they throw at you!

These scandals are not only restricted to the UK, worldwide abuse by elected representatives of our fab democracies are "at it" non-stop, and you muvva fuckers are paying for them to whoop it up, have fab. luxury travels, apartments, cars, whores, you name it they do it, and all in the name of a clean, non-corrupt, democracy. St.Jagged's BUTT is cleaner after a double hot Indian curry and the inevitable dose of diahhrea!

St.Jagged would never want to live under the iron rule of a dictatorship (his WAN-KIN-DIK once lived under Mao, fat bastard, and he was corrupt as Hitler, murdered a couple of million too, what an analogy!) , but at least everybody knows these muvva fuckers are corrupt. Our democrats with their "Schein Heilig" behaviour, acting as if they're only there for us, are not much better either, bunch of hypocritical lying twats!

Ol black Messiah big boots over in the US should have set an example to the rest of the corrupt imbeciles and gone and lived in a council house. He could have turned the "Black House" into a brand new, massive, high - tec hospital only to serve the homeless, the unemployed, forced into unemployemnt by those fat cat corrupt CEO bankers, and the impoverished who can't afford decent medical care.

Then ol Barack "Big Head wannabee Messiah" would really start moving things in the right direction and set a signal to the rest of the planet (which planet? Human inhabited earth, no way!)

What else has shocked the world since St.Jagged has been surfing in foreign parts, oh yeah, Fiat want to buy those bunch of cripples General Motors European and Porsche want to buy VW making them both the strongest car producers on the planet alongside Toyota!

Fuck me Jaggedone's remember that majestic blog : Who really won the war? Written by the one and only St.Jagged (who fucking else!), well the TRUTH of that one is becoming very plain to see, Sieg (Adolf) Heil, arrivederci (Mussolini) Bella, Banzai (Emperor SAKI KILL BILL!)

British car makers, steel makers, energy producers, aeroplane producers, electric goods producers, computer producers, where the fuck are you????? Nowhere, whilst our old enemies have crept up our backsides, hit us for six, and will soon be telling us to fuck off, well they do that already actually!

As you can read Jaggedone's, ol St.Jagged has been pretty busy and he will soon return to continue his worthless "TRUTH Crusades" whilst picking on every corrupt, dishonest, craphead who continues to spread global misery whilst telling us all gigantic packs of lies.

Filling their own pockets and then fucking off to write their memoirs so every one of you who voted for them can read how wonderful they all were (did St.Jagged mention Blair and Bush, wait till their best-selling books of lies and scandals hit the book shops, you'll all be in the queue won't you muvva fuckers!), pocket another couple of million and then hopefully DIE!!!!

Well that's it JO'ers St.Jagged will soon be back and next time you put your crosses on those ballot sheets, think of ol whiter than white living in his council house in downtown Washington, my fucking arse!!! Aufwiedersehen and Chou Bellas, from Herr St.Jagged and Senöri WAN-KIN-DIK (we want to be with on the winning side when the countdown starts, Sieg Heil!)

Shocking Newsflash for all non Gays and non-Lesbo Catholics (the 2 of you)

Jaggedone's this newsflash just reached the St.Jagged's headquarters from the Jaggedone over at the CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) headquarters (fucking confused, so is St.Jagged, me myself and I, Schizo bastards!) and St.Jagged and his hardening WAN-KIN-DIK thought it would be of interest to all straight Catholics around the planet.

You are about to lose 75% of your flock (no, not the sheepshaggers amongst you!) in other words the Gay/Lesbian catholic community are fucking off to form their own religion. Well fucking good riddance say's anti-religious St.Jagged and me ol Chinese Wanker, WAN-KIN-DIK.

Jaggedone's please read with care and if you feel in anyway associated with this newsflash, go and shoot yourselves or pray for forgiveness and redemption!

Read with pleasure the following and very shocking newsflash from the Jaggedone over at the Spoof (you know where):

Gay & Lesbian rights groups are abandoning the Catholic church and forming their own global religion called "We are the only natural sons and daughters of God, Amen and fuck the rest especially if their not."
The reason for this shock, global announcement by all straight Gays and Lesbians is the continuing, blasphemous associations with gay and paedophile priests within the Catholic church, they wish to have nothing to do with such a bunch of perverts (what!!).
Their message to the non-gay world is: We are the true children of God, our way of life and sexual orientations are the natural way and time will prove that being gay is the only way to find God (who?). Catholic priests and other religious representatives who practice their perverted acts behind the cloak of religion will burn in hell along with all other practisers of perverted sexual acts.
The elected Pope of the new global all gay religion his right honourable Julian Bum-Basher sent the following message to the rest of the shocked non-gay world from his cathedral in downtown San Francisco on the sacred day of all gays, the original Gay Parade in surprise, San Francisco:
"Brothers and Sisters we are the true children of God (who?) our way of life will prove that sustainable life given to us by the Almighty and his Prophets is the only natural way to heaven (via Amsterdam). We will prove that in the evolutionary process only the strongest survive and all other weak sinners will perish."
"We are rapidly gaining in numbers so go forward on your crusades of infiltrating the impure hetro/non-gay ruling world of politics, religion and education and fuck everybody who is doubting, including vulnerable teenies and Imo's. Prove to them the gay way is the only way, also condemn those perverts in the Catholic Church for tarnishing our pristine reputation."
"God has told me and my prophets, go gay, enter me (backwards) and I will open the pearly gates to heaven for the only true Children of God."
Pope Benedict XV1 on hearing of this devastating split in his very perverted church rapidly sent an Email to God (who?). He asked for forgiveness and redemption for his flock and rapidly defected over to the muslim faith, becoming the new Iman at the blue Mosque in straight, downtown Riyadh leaving his flock to face the wrath of a rapidly becoming and very camp, God (who?).