dinsdag 18 augustus 2009

God (who?) and his Sidekick (who?) speak to St. Jagged!!

He looked slightly different whilst talking to St.Jagged but not his sidekick above, now what's his name S***N maybe?!

Hey Jaggedone's, yes muvva fuckers, God (who?) has discovered St.Jagged's (alias The Jaggedone) superb works on this ere blog site and across at the http://www.thespoof.com/ site and thinks it's about time that the world fucking knew it!!

No, no Jaggedone's ol St.Jagged has not converted, become religious or anything and his ol WAN-KIN-DIK is a fucking Buddhist anyway (believes he will return as a superior being next time, a white, albino, very fat, demon-eyed river rat, daft Chink DIK, the Chinks believe rats are superior beings and albino's are the DEVIL (who?) in person???) and St.Jagged thought he would share this monumentous happening with all of you (who?)!

The message from above was transmitted via The Spoof and that mob don't believe a shit either!

Don McLean once wrote a fabulous song about Vincent Van Gogh called Vincent (boring!) and one of his lines was:
" They didn't listen then, they're still not listening now, perhaps they never will!" or something like that!

Jaggedone's, the following piece can be ignored, but beware before you throw it in the rubbish bin, there might be some elements of the TRUTH hidden between the lines and the bullshit, beware!!!!

Here we go:

GOD gives exclusive interview to The Spoof implying his world is full of "Power Crazed, greedy Bastards!!

Written by Jaggedone
Tags: God

GOD (yes the real GOD, who?) has given an exclusive interview to the Spoof family of writers and readers. Astonished by this call from above (or below!) The Spoof, believing that the whole thing was a sham, decided eventually to send a representative to this astonishing, historical occasion reason being: The Spoof has no boundaries, heavenly or hellish! Anyway, The Spoof ordered Jaggedone and his CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) to go along as JO (Jaggedone, btw is a predominant Pyscho Socialite crap writer, a raving nutter and is suitable to face GOD, Jesus Budda also, but he's full of crap!) believes in the powers of a non-interventionist GOD, albeit not the GOD who is projected in human, wordly religions!

GOD appeared in his favourite disguise, a Clochard under a bridge in Amsterdam with his sidekick, a very huge albino rat with piercing red, satanic, demon-like eyes! Jaggedone trembling at his ageing knees asked GOD, "why have you called The Spoof for this exclusive interview and not the Pope for example?"
God answered, "Spoof writers and readers see the world in different dimensions, laugh at the world and are seriously funny, I the Almighty need to convey my message through those channels otherwise nobody will ever f*****g believe me."

"Those bullshitting, hypocritical, lying, earthly religious leaders are so full of crap and religious dogma they could never tell the TRUTH!"

Jaggedone asked GOD, "but why now and what should the Spoof do?"

"I gave the world Jesus, Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Mother Teresa, The Elephant Man, etc, as positive examples, mankind ignored them, so be it!"

"I gave the world Hitler, Mao, Nero, Stalin, Ghengis Khan, wicked dictators, Egyptian/Roman Emperors, evil bastards all of them and the world still hasn't learnt to live in peace, so be it!"

"I've warned the world many times not to destroy my beautiful trees, natural habitats, their animals, etc, etc, and now, ENOUGH IS ENOUGH, so be it!"

"The ice caps will melt, typhoons, earthquakes, floods, tsunamis, etc, will cause havoc, death and destruction, i.e. This weekend in Taiwan, gigantic avalanches of mud caused death and mayhem because there are no trees to stop them!"

"Stupid ignorant people have ignored the signs in their pursuit for power, greed, and false GODS, OK, so be it!"

"Mankind will pay the price for his failings that is my message to The Spoof, their honourable writers and readership, so be it!"

Jaggedone now alone (his cowardly cockroaches scampering for the nearest sewer hole) with GOD and his Sidekick (who?) asked a final question, "GOD, how should any sane mother fucker believe this utter bullshit?"

GOD answered "that's the reason why I'm telling The Spoof, as for the rest, well I don't give a shit, so be it!!"
JO, blinked for one second in disbelief, the Clochard (GOD) and his albino Sidekick, simply disappeared, so was it!!!
There it is Jaggedone's, take it or leave, you can even wipe your arses with it, but never underestimate the "POWER OF ???!" (WHO?)
Godbye, Aufwiedersehen and Amen!!!!

Geen opmerkingen: