maandag 25 mei 2009

St.Jagged fights for the freedom from slavery of Indian Dalits

My Asian Jaggedone"s should take the following blog with a pinch of rancid shit and be shocked at the horrendous truth behind the story.

Of course St.Jagged slightly altered the report to at least attempt to raise a cynical, humourous awareness of the plight of these very poor bastards. What else should ST.Jagged do, cry into his veggy curry!

After observing the plight of the Dalits you begin to realise that St.Jagged could well be telling the fucking TRUTH and the world is full of crap!

Well enjoy it and think deeply about your visit and complaint about the next pristine clean motorway bog, while the Dalits in Mumbai have to share one shithole amongst 800!!!

Here we go the title is:

Indian lowest cast Dalits given publicity by the Beeb for their luxury lifestyle!

Another superb "Beeb" roving reporter gave the world an insight on BBC World, into the Indian cast (slave) system and proved that the slavedrivers are acting in a "humane" and correct way.
"Dalits are happy with their "Karma", and should be forced into modern - day slavery otherwise they would all end up in the shithole slums of Mumbai, amongst the human excrement, rubbish and squalour," they proclaim.
The Slavedrivers (or higher cast landowners) offer a pristine clean, working environment, healthy meals (rice, rice and even more rice) supplemented by luxury rat meat. Contrary to filthy slum living with 800 people utilising one toilet, sewer rats, and a constant flow of human SHIT and disease.
Dalits wishing to escape slavery should think twice before rushing off to the shitholes of Bombay, at least they can breathe the fresh air of country life and fulfill their Karma decently, albeit with a whip up their backsides!
The "Beeb" reporter acting humbly sampling a 5***** country rat menu said "umm, delicious, tastes just like chicken and free of any sewerage leftovers like those other stinking rats swimming in the crap of Mumbai."
Superb reporting and an excellent insight into an "alternative lifestyle"." The Beeb alongside the Sri Lankan (experts at package holidays to revolting places!) and Indian tourist boards are actually thinking of starting package hols. to the Dalit areas hoping that their "way of life" attracts global attention, makes the rich landowner bastards even richer and keeps the "muy pobre" Dalits in their fucking place!
Jaggedone refused to send his CIA (cockroach infiltration army) to the area to discover the "TRUTH", the dangers of infection and disease for his intrepid Cockroach reporters was too risky!

woensdag 20 mei 2009

Loony/Corrupt Damian Hirst send him off to the starving millions in Africa/Art for Arts sake!

Ja, Ja, Ja-ggedones, he's back quicker than you all thought, reasons:

St.Jagged saw a documentary on the fab BEEB, better known as the BBC, and it got right on his almighty fucking nerves!
The docu. followed the steps of a bungling, crap reporter trying to infiltrate the world of contemporary art, gallerists, auctioneers, and most important that fab, trendy artist, Damien Hirst, what a massive tosser he is!

Hirst, multi billionaire crap/shocker painter along with corrupt auctioneers, Sotheby's, Christies and his gallerists manipulate the prices of Hirst's shitty works and other well known contemporary artists too. Keeping their prices at astronomical levels and flogging their shit to the deaf, dumb, blind and very rich and famous multi-billionaire, trend-setty fraternity, manipulating and corrupting the system on the way!

St.Jagged had seen enough when these lumps of banal art (shit) were being sold for amounts, which could feed a starving African nation for a year, and ended up on the walls of some banal mega-rich bullshitters who find it necessary to have the crap hanging on their walls, they should be sent post-haste in the direction of a shit-hole shanty town in downtown Congo and invest their worthless billions decently!

Have a read, have a laugh, and think about the waste of money being thrown down the throats of Mr "Devilish" Damian and his cohorts, FUCK OFF ALL OF YOU!!

Here we go:

A very cutting documentary has been released about Damian Hirst, his gallerists, the auctioneers, the contemporary art world generally and how the fuck they all manipulate the astronomical prices of their so called works of very crappy, contemporary art.
The nosy, toss of a reporter was sometimes even refused entrance to many auctions of Hirsts superior art (my butt!). But the Jaggedone's CIA (cockroach infiltration Army) never failing to miss a piece of arty farty scandal, promptly sent there superstar art-reporter "Vinny Van Cock" behind the scenes to pick up some scandal and info about how these mega-rich morons take the piss out of us all, here his report:
Damian knows his "art" is absolute crap but certainly does know how to shock the public very well, manipulate and force the prices of his crap sky-high.
Golden cows, sharks, Jesus in urine, stubbed out dog-ends, diamond skulls, butterfly bullshit, you name it devilish Damian flogs it. He even has the audacity to let others make his crap works of art for him and then puts his mega-rich signature on the bottom.
Other lower league contemporary artists practise the same thing, produce crap and flog it to deaf, dumb, blind mega-rich morons. Their gallerists and auctioneers also manipulate the prices so keeping the mega-crap artworks priced at astronomical levels. 30 million bucks for a single coloured canvas, not even a real artist like Vincent Van Gogh could achieve that!
Anyway our intrepid reporter "Vinny Van Cock" passed all of the corrupted info over to that tosser reporter (Daily "Scrap" Mail) waiting in his "cool" very gay, pink Bubblecar.
Damian and his morons will obviously continue to earn billions, the ignorant public will continiue to flock to the museums admiring a piece of horses manure plonked in the corner, "Oh golly, how wunderbar Darling, we must have it."
In the mean time superstar CIA reporter, "Vinny Van Cock" has six-legged it off with a real piece of art under his gut, a Picasso, worth peanuts compared to the "oh so fabby" devilish Damian's crap!

vrijdag 15 mei 2009

St.Jagged warned you Muvva Fuckers, now swallow it!

Back home at fucking last, a very tired St.Jagged and his very limp, half-starved Chink, WAN-KIN-DIK have returned home after travelling the cyber waves, soaking up fame and notoriety in an effort to get the TRUTH across to the billions of ignorants inhabiting this very sad planet and they still don't fucking listen!! Here a few examples:

Most Brit MP's have been claiming outrageous expenses and now an independent control body has opened a corrupt "Can of Worms" leaking stories of unbelievable abuses of expense claims.

Shamed MP's now have either to pay back the illegally claimed, tax payers money or get the fucking "JACK-BOOT" up their butts and leave their highly, over-payed jobs, aah!

Well muvva fuckers, whats new? St.Jagged has been warning you bunch about VOTING for these arseholes, and now the inevitable TRUTH is coming out, you all put them there and you tax-payers deserve every lump of corrupt shit that they throw at you!

These scandals are not only restricted to the UK, worldwide abuse by elected representatives of our fab democracies are "at it" non-stop, and you muvva fuckers are paying for them to whoop it up, have fab. luxury travels, apartments, cars, whores, you name it they do it, and all in the name of a clean, non-corrupt, democracy. St.Jagged's BUTT is cleaner after a double hot Indian curry and the inevitable dose of diahhrea!

St.Jagged would never want to live under the iron rule of a dictatorship (his WAN-KIN-DIK once lived under Mao, fat bastard, and he was corrupt as Hitler, murdered a couple of million too, what an analogy!) , but at least everybody knows these muvva fuckers are corrupt. Our democrats with their "Schein Heilig" behaviour, acting as if they're only there for us, are not much better either, bunch of hypocritical lying twats!

Ol black Messiah big boots over in the US should have set an example to the rest of the corrupt imbeciles and gone and lived in a council house. He could have turned the "Black House" into a brand new, massive, high - tec hospital only to serve the homeless, the unemployed, forced into unemployemnt by those fat cat corrupt CEO bankers, and the impoverished who can't afford decent medical care.

Then ol Barack "Big Head wannabee Messiah" would really start moving things in the right direction and set a signal to the rest of the planet (which planet? Human inhabited earth, no way!)

What else has shocked the world since St.Jagged has been surfing in foreign parts, oh yeah, Fiat want to buy those bunch of cripples General Motors European and Porsche want to buy VW making them both the strongest car producers on the planet alongside Toyota!

Fuck me Jaggedone's remember that majestic blog : Who really won the war? Written by the one and only St.Jagged (who fucking else!), well the TRUTH of that one is becoming very plain to see, Sieg (Adolf) Heil, arrivederci (Mussolini) Bella, Banzai (Emperor SAKI KILL BILL!)

British car makers, steel makers, energy producers, aeroplane producers, electric goods producers, computer producers, where the fuck are you????? Nowhere, whilst our old enemies have crept up our backsides, hit us for six, and will soon be telling us to fuck off, well they do that already actually!

As you can read Jaggedone's, ol St.Jagged has been pretty busy and he will soon return to continue his worthless "TRUTH Crusades" whilst picking on every corrupt, dishonest, craphead who continues to spread global misery whilst telling us all gigantic packs of lies.
Filling their own pockets and then fucking off to write their memoirs so every one of you who voted for them can read how wonderful they all were (did St.Jagged mention Blair and Bush, wait till their best-selling books of lies and scandals hit the book shops, you'll all be in the queue won't you muvva fuckers!), pocket another couple of million and then hopefully DIE!!!!

Well that's it JO'ers St.Jagged will soon be back and next time you put your crosses on those ballot sheets, think of ol whiter than white living in his council house in downtown Washington, my fucking arse!!! Aufwiedersehen and Chou Bellas, from Herr St.Jagged and Senöri WAN-KIN-DIK (we want to be with on the winning side when the countdown starts, Sieg Heil!)

donderdag 7 mei 2009

Shocking Newsflash for all non Gays and non-Lesbo Catholics (the 2 of you)

Jaggedone's this newsflash just reached the St.Jagged's headquarters from the Jaggedone over at the CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) headquarters (fucking confused, so is St.Jagged, me myself and I, Schizo bastards!) and St.Jagged and his hardening WAN-KIN-DIK thought it would be of interest to all straight Catholics around the planet.

You are about to lose 75% of your flock (no, not the sheepshaggers amongst you!) in other words the Gay/Lesbian catholic community are fucking off to form their own religion. Well fucking good riddance say's anti-religious St.Jagged and me ol Chinese Wanker, WAN-KIN-DIK.

Jaggedone's please read with care and if you feel in anyway associated with this newsflash, go and shoot yourselves or pray for forgiveness and redemption!

Read with pleasure the following and very shocking newsflash from the Jaggedone over at the Spoof (you know where):

Gay & Lesbian rights groups are abandoning the Catholic church and forming their own global religion called "We are the only natural sons and daughters of God, Amen and fuck the rest especially if their not."
The reason for this shock, global announcement by all straight Gays and Lesbians is the continuing, blasphemous associations with gay and paedophile priests within the Catholic church, they wish to have nothing to do with such a bunch of perverts (what!!).
Their message to the non-gay world is: We are the true children of God, our way of life and sexual orientations are the natural way and time will prove that being gay is the only way to find God (who?). Catholic priests and other religious representatives who practice their perverted acts behind the cloak of religion will burn in hell along with all other practisers of perverted sexual acts.
The elected Pope of the new global all gay religion his right honourable Julian Bum-Basher sent the following message to the rest of the shocked non-gay world from his cathedral in downtown San Francisco on the sacred day of all gays, the original Gay Parade in surprise, San Francisco:
"Brothers and Sisters we are the true children of God (who?) our way of life will prove that sustainable life given to us by the Almighty and his Prophets is the only natural way to heaven (via Amsterdam). We will prove that in the evolutionary process only the strongest survive and all other weak sinners will perish."
"We are rapidly gaining in numbers so go forward on your crusades of infiltrating the impure hetro/non-gay ruling world of politics, religion and education and fuck everybody who is doubting, including vulnerable teenies and Imo's. Prove to them the gay way is the only way, also condemn those perverts in the Catholic Church for tarnishing our pristine reputation."
"God has told me and my prophets, go gay, enter me (backwards) and I will open the pearly gates to heaven for the only true Children of God."
Pope Benedict XV1 on hearing of this devastating split in his very perverted church rapidly sent an Email to God (who?). He asked for forgiveness and redemption for his flock and rapidly defected over to the muslim faith, becoming the new Iman at the blue Mosque in straight, downtown Riyadh leaving his flock to face the wrath of a rapidly becoming and very camp, God (who?).