zondag 30 maart 2008

To Jeffy from St.Jagged


Jeffy, welcome to the absolute madhouse, loonybin called Jagged Edge bla, bla, bla.


You are the 60 trillionth member of the St.Jagged world - wide anti political and TRUTH crusading army, congratulations!!!


This means you will suffer for the rest of your sad and pathetic life like the rest of the 59999 trillion members who have achieved "Perfect Insanity" (Disturbed we love you!) and are willing to relinquish their daily, boring and very shitty lives for the universal quest in finding the "Real "Fucking" Truth."


Jesus, Mohammed, him pictured above, and the rest have nothing on St.Jagged and his crusades on ignorance, greed, power, jealousy, untruths, etc. They all pale into insignificance after the "Jagged Army" has cleansed and purified the minds of the trillions and launched them all into a ballisitic, universal orbit of free thinking spasms.


This is the true LOONYBIN and once you enter there is no way back and you may never leave. (nicked that one from Hotel California, thankyou crap rock, country group from way back when, keep flying muvva fuckers!)


Jeffy, unfortunately for this proud achievement there is only one prize, and the muvva fucking straight Jacket is winging it's way too you via a Sir "money bags" (earlier blog worth reading!) Richard Branson, atomic driven, rocket - powered, hot air balloon, packed with over heated virgins just waiting to release their fruity juices upon the lucky winner!


The straight jacket should be worn before take -off and only on reaching the "Golden Fleece called the TRUTH" is it safe to remove (beware of all counterfeit copies off the TRUTH they could lead you to the pearly gates of the real hell on earth, BIN fucking LADEN's brothel. Hidden somewhere in the caves of Pakistan and entry only allowed to top US politicians, Hilary, Baraka, Georgie Porgie and of course Tony ( once true Brit (another fantastic creation from the twisted and very bloggy mind of ST.Jagged) now complete shit) "Huggy Bear" Blair (leave the bitch wives and Bill (I never had sex, bla, bla, bla, well we all know the TRUTH on that story!!) behind) and enter Bin's infamous brothel for a good ol orgie on behalf of all Iraquis killed by terrorist bombs in a down town, fucking shit hole Baghdad (fuck on Saddam, wish you were here or not?).


Jeffy, once more congrats, you have achieved a historical and astonishing phase in your life and you will never be the same again, just like the rest of us loonies here at the one and only:


BACK STABBING, LOONYBIN, STRAIGHT (JACKET) ANTI - POLIYTICAL PARTY SPONSORED BY:


ST.JAGGED, HIS JAGGED ONE'S, HIS MERRY OL FARTS, COCA COLA and MACDONALDS (FUCK OFF!!) AND ALL NON - CORRUPT POLITICIANS ON THE PLANET (thats radically narrowed my sponsor list down to one or maybe two! excluding Ghandi, Mother Teresa, Krishnamurti, Martin Luther, Jesus Christ, etc, they shat on politics and were sacrificed accordingly OK not M. Teresa and Krishna, clever arseholes!)


Keep on reading muvva fuckers and don't forget to jump over the cuckoo's nest now and then.

(Jack Nicholson, who the fuck is that "Shining", happy, mad arsehole?)


Greetings from St.Jagged, his mingy, synchrone swimming goldfish, half - starved, incarcerated pet spider called Schwarzenegger, sad but true Metallica fan called Harvey the "Gay"rabbit (turned "Gay" because of the demands from female rabbits for his massive dick!), and last not least the dogs turd that was caught on the bottom of ST.Jagged's shoes whilst dancing merrily (not gaily!) around the indigenous TOTEM POLE at Itchicoo Park!! (God save LS fucking D the 9th wonder of the world!)


Goodbye Jeffy and Co.






woensdag 26 maart 2008

Fight the E (Enemy) Numbers

Allo, allo, allo, devoted Jagged ones. St.Jagged would bet a million bucks that you are riveted to your computer screens waiting and dying to find out what St.Jagged has up his sleasy sleeve for you all now.



Please study carefully the picture above, this is your fucking E - nemy and he poisons in a similair method to what is poisoning and devouring your intestines if you keep on feeding those deadly E -numbers to yourselves and your lovely kiddie winkies, EEGH! Scared muvva fuckers or not?

St.Jagged has also had to accept the fact that the global ready made food industry is slowly poisoning our guts and brains with the crap it sells in our, oh so, wonderful supermarkets, shops, fast food, junk restaurants, etc.

They are being supported by the mega - global marketing and advertising companies and they are all at IT!

Brainwashing and blinding us all with pretty colourings, dodgy fucking taste enhancers, lots of hidden chemicals, EEE's, even more EEEE's and factory produced, thrown together ingredients which, none of us know what the fuck they are and what we all are consuming!

Grandma of St.Jagged pipes in:

"Oh I just went down to the corner shop and bought some lovely bangers (sausages for foreign braindeads, you must be fucking braindead to read this bullshit!) crisps and sweeties for my tinky winky grandkiddies, plus fizzy lemonade drinks to wash all the shit down afterwards and don't forget that lovely looking, pink - icing covered cake, for afters." Says grandma after spending all of her hard earned pension on titty - bitties for the kiddie winkies.


Well Jagged one's lets all study Grandma's little list:

Sausages = dead, crap scrap bits of intestinal, leftover "meat" products, churned up together and squeezed into a skin of condom size sheeps gut. Enhanced with E, E, and another load of EEEE's to give them the final workover and fine tuning, abracadabra what have we here, a fucking sausage!! (you can stick it up your arse it might taste better!)


Sweets = Hard boiled lumps of colourful sugar and choccies (mega good for your teeth those are!) artificial colourings, flavours and surprise, surprise E (by gum lad!), E, and loads of other EEEE's, wrap em all in lovely coloured sweety papers, give em some cool name and abracadabra what have we got, sweeties! (All sold for the benefit of dentists world - wide to keep them in even more luxury! could there be a hidden and devastating plot behind the TRUTH of our black holes and filling filled decaying teeth! who knows and who killed Kennedy? Another great mystery yet to be solved! )

"Get on with the Blog muvva fucker!"

Crisps = really, real potatoes, (ha bloody ha) artificial flavours, colourings, E, E, and lots more EEEE's, chuck em all in a nice little colourful packet and abracadabra what have we here, fucking crispier than crisp, crisps! (well they do taste like paprikas even though they are the hybrid type and also very good for the ol heart attacks with all of that salt an all!)


Fizzy lemonade drinks = bubbly water coloured with artificial colourings, real fruit extracts, really, real fruit??? ("fuck off, who the hell do they think we all are, morons." "Yes muvva fuckers, you all buy the crap and make Coca Cola and the rest some of the richest companies on the planet") Tons of sugar (again excellent for the dentists and their rotting toothy business!) or chemical sweeteners (poisons) and last not least, E,E, and lots of other EEEE's, bottle it all in a fancy shaped bottle with a funky label and abracadabra what have we got, fizzy (pissy) drinks for the kiddie winkies and morons, wow! (fuck on rich bitch dentists!)

Colourful cakes = crap, white (no racist preferences here!) wheat products, tons and tons of white sugar (no racist preferences here either!), sticky stodgy fillings filled with guess what, artificial flavourings, colours and those E (Enemy) EEEE's again and abracadrabra what have we got, artificial coloury looking, lovely tasty cakes. (These cakes and the items mentioned above are all made in support of the campaign started by the dentists unions world- wide for the right to make even more millions from the treatment of the black, rotting tooth plague! One more Porsche please!)


"Oh St.Jagged you can be so cutting, I love all of those sticky cakes, sweeties, fizzy drinks, sausages, burgers and all the rest of the crap you can buy in our wonderful supermarkets and junk food restaurants" (St.Jagged's inner conscience arouses with rumblings in his tummy)


"Fuck off inner conscience and go back to your veggie, bio - products in hell existence."


Avid Jagged readers and thats only the beginning of the list:


Ready made Pizzas, pre - packed meals, pies, sweets, cooked meats, tinned meats, tinned soups, tinned fucking anything! sweetened juicy drinks, burgers (Mac fucking who! never on your life!!), Kentucky Fried Chickens (what chickens? pumped full of hormones, kept in cages, feathered and headless creatures), ketchups, ready made sauces, canned fruits, etc. You name it, and St.Jagged is certain they're all on the list of products which, are gradually poisoning us all!

"Yeh St.Jagged why don't you just accept the world is full of crap and we are ravagingly consuming it on a daily basis, creating mountains of plastic rubbish and, enough is enough, I just happen to be fucking starving"
(St.Jaggeds innerconscience is really getting pissed off now and his tummy is rumbling even more violently)

Ok, Ok, St.Jagged collapses with hunger, and fucks off for an over indulgent quicky at Burgerking, chips, burgers, ketchups, and a full up with EEEE's, coloury, sugary, sticky ice cream for afters, fuck my health, fuck my teeth and fuck the do - goody veggies and health freaks an all! (St.Jagged gives in to his inner conscience and decides to let loose and satisfy his desperate hunger (apologies to all starving African children who, really know the meaning of HUNGER and STARVATION!), by filling his guts with junky, crap, fast food, supplied by one of those friendly, honest, muvva fucking, multi - billion, global companies)

Well avid Jagged one's thats it for now, and I wasn't being serious about eating all of that junk food crap, St. Jagged takes his eating and drinking very serious and I'm just about to go and get very, very, pissed!

Goodbye from St Jagged and his merry ol black teeth!

maandag 17 maart 2008

Doggies Stinky Doings!

My beloved Jagged one's, this whole blog thing STINKS, St. Jagged and his merry ol Bullshitters thought they would wow you all into action by offering to let you all join the "Truth" crusade and become official members of the:

The Back Stabbing, Loonybin, Straight (Jacket), Anti - Political Party



and not one of you dedicated followers has applied for our fabulous, colourful info - packs, shame on you muvva fuckers!


Your chances of joining this oh so very important crusade are vanishing because St.Jagged has had requests from the following, mega - important, global playing, manipulating, anti political parties to form a global - coalition and membership is limited only to those who believe that politics is a load of ol bollocks, the list is as follows:
  • The canine "barking fucking mad" Club in Vancouver
  • The goldfish "civil rights" Club in outer Mongolia (swimming like lost souls in their ol fish bowls, oops sorry Pink Floyd fans, and St. Jagged really wishes you were not here)
  • The Freedom for Ants from their Queens (Gay ones an all!) Club
  • The Free all "humpless" incacerated camels Club (desert Nomads beware, St.Jagged is after your fucking goats testacles and Bin Ladens golden balls)
  • The fight for the right for bats to hang up side down as long as they fucking want to Club (especially those hanging in Australia),
  • and last not least
  • The Freedom for Great White Sharks to attack muvva fucking, idiot surfers Liberty Club in protest against all "mother fucking" idiot surfers who have swam across the path of this magnificent beast and had their arses bitten off after being mistaken for a seal and caused the Great White to lose or break some of its jagged teeth whilst biting the shit out of plastic surfboards (fuck on you great white sharks and tell the pretty boy, blond, bleached surfer fraternity to, FUCK OFF and make their own waves).
Avid Jagged ones you have been warned, the world of Jagged Edge is reaching global proportions and mega - popularity (Stephen King is shite compared to the popularity of St.Jagged!), we here at Jagged Edge Publications are crusading in the name of the "TRUTH" and no other muvva fucker has ever done that before without getting his balls cut off.

Don't miss your "Golden Opportunity", join now while there are still free places and don't forget to send your million buck donations posted to the following adress:
ST. Jagged,
In the Loonybin,
Somewhere between The ravaged rain forests of Brazil and The Great (decimated) Barrier Reef in Aussie fucking land (Great Whites beware, St Jagged is boarding his high powered, titanium, surfboard and will kick your fucking great white teeth right back down your dirty great big throats, apart from that oh so scary Jaws, real life looking great white in Mr. Spielbergs classic film, Jaws 55!).
PO Box 666 (sign of St.Jaggeds best friend and leader of anti - christs the world over),
In Hell or Heaven (depending on your denomination).

Anyway Jagged Edge lovers here is the real reason for this fabulous piece of high level, load of ol bollocks and very intellectual masterpiece:

Stinking dogs crap on the bottom of St. Jagged's shoes.
Dog owners get a fucking life and wipe your little sweeties butts after they have dropped thier tons of crap all over the planet, especially on the path where St. Jagged breathes his daily dose of unpolluted air (rare places to find these days).

And then have the common decency to clean up those heaps of steaming, stinking, revolting doggies crap before innocents like St.Jagged and his merry ol junior St.Jagged's tread right in your "little sweeties" mountain of left - behind, dogs - shit!

Pooh, stinky winky, St. Jagged beleives every muvva fucker on the planet has at least once in their lives trod in dogs crap and had the disgusting pleasure of cleaning their glossy, covered with doggies doings, stinking shoes, and felt violently sick whilst doing it.

Our children have to venture through major minefields whilst playing in playgrounds or in the parks. Picnics can be really great fun when Fido the alsation dog has just released his bowels 2 meters away from the chequered, blue and white table cloth, full with lovely smelling, fried chicken, sandwiches, cakes and "uugh, whats that pong darling, my champagne smells slightly crappy today?" (a posh voice asking his very posh spouse in a very posh park, a very stinky question)

Dog - owners seem to think that their sweet little, four - legged, hairy family members, have the right to crap anywhere and anytime they want to and regard the rest of us grumpy ol, non - dog owners, as members of an SS - Nazi murder troop when we dare criticise the behaviour of their beloved, crapping, "Mans best friend."
"Yeh St. Jagged, your just a miserable ol grumpy bastard and see only the crap that these hairy monsters leave behind" (St.Jagged's inner conscience wakes up) "Doggies can be helpful, playful, leading the blind, loving, intelligent, hard - working and wonderful members of the family" (St. Jagged's inner conscience is slowly getting up St.Jaggeds very sensitive fucking nose, fuck off back to sleep inner conscience!)
They stink, their breath smells, they ruin the furniture, bite my fucking slippers to death, dig holes in my beautiful, flowery garden, jump up when i've got my brand new, white coloured trousers on, nick the best and warmest seat in the house, cuddle up and sleep on my fucking bed, are smothered with flees and cost hundreds of bucks at the vets! Got any more problems!
St.Jagged loves dogs really, dog - lovers, as long as they are not his, don't shit all over the planet, and lead the blind.
Dog - owners do St.Jagged a favour, pick up their crap, go to doggie bogs, keep them away from kiddies playgrounds, don't visit my house after it has been raining with your "little sweety" and most important of all give them some toothpaste tablets before they attempt to lick St.Jaggeds pretty face!
Anyway that' s (h) it for today, St. Jagged has to rush to the sink with his brand new, shiny black shoes, because there is a complaint from his spouse about a strange aroma circulating the house, oh fuck me, dogs shit on my shoes!
Goodbye, fellow dog - lovers, cat - haters, bird - killers and sheep - shaggers!






zondag 9 maart 2008

Napolean once said Britain is a Nation full of shopkeepers

ATTENTION, ACHTUNG, VERY IMPORTANTE NEWSFLASH!!!!
(Don't worry Jagged one's, St.Jagged is not opening his dirty ol plastic raincoat, flash, so as in flasher, get it!)


Devoted Jagged one's, here is a shock announcement!!!


ST. JAGGED AND HIS MERRY SHAGGERS ARE FORMING AN ANTI - POLITICAL PARTY CALLED:
THE BACK STABBING, LOONYBIN, STRAIGHT (Jacket) ANTI -POLITICAL PARTY
This anti - political party is free for all devoted Jagged one's and it stands left of the right and right of the left, meaning you can all join and vote in any direction for St.Jagged and his merry ol bunch of Shaggers (no, we're not sheepshaggers, just normal shaggers!).
We will represent your jagged opinions in parlament and fight for your rights without corruption, greed, power and all of the other shit that other political parties represent.
Apply for membership forms through this crappy blog - site and become a (free) member of the Jagged party for anti - politics. We can assure you the party stands only for truth, freedom of opinion, the right to piss in the wind and against the wind and most important of all, the right to take the piss out of every other sane (or insane!) politician on the planet.
JOIN THE JAGGED ARMY NOW AND RECEIVE YOUR FREE INFO - BROCHURE ABOUT OUR ANTI - POLICIES , ANTI - CORRUPTION, ANTI - GREED, ANTI - TOSSERS, ANTI - BRITNEY SPEARS AND ANTI ALL OTHER WANKERS DIRECTIVES AND VOTE, VOTE, VOTE FOR:
THE BACK STABBING, LOONYBIN, STRAIGHT (Jacket) ANTI -POLITICAL PARTY

Anyway Jagged one's, now to the real point of this fab, fab and very fab, fucking blog.


Napolean once called the Brits a nation of shopkeepers, well he was right, but due to evolution and the multi - culti revolution St. Jagged has put his mind to the subject, SHOPKEEPERS in the UK.



ST. Jagged has just returned from a blitz journey to his homeland and before he left on this blitz - trip (thats Kraut by the way for BLITZ as in BLITZKRIEG, linguistic morons amongst you!) he was advised by the one and only ALI G. to renew his passport because the UK had become a melting pot filled with different races and colours.



St.Jagged took his advice and he suggested I should take either an Indian, Polish, Pakistani, Azarbazjahni (sorry about the spelling, St Jagged only speaks and writes perfect in 500 languages, and that one is not one of them! big -headed muvva fucker!) Sri Lanken, Icelandian, (home of my favourite screaming fucking nutcase, Bjork or whoever, dopey bitch who conquered the pop world with her utter, utter madness) West Indian, Mexican (no Ali G, they're only permitted in the USA and not the UK!) Turkish, Iraq (K) ian, Iranian or eventually a real British Passport, surprise, surprise!


I told big dick AlI G to go and fuck himself and fuck that Egyptian billionare, owner of the worlds most famous football team after Kevin and his mighty midget Newastle Utd wankers of course, Fulham FC and Harrods (real British heritage that one!), Mr Personality, mega - rapper, Mohammed Al Fayed himself and wannabee TRUE BRIT! (Ali G your pisstake was brilliant, congrats, a membership form from THE BACK STABBING, LOONYBIN, STRAIGHT (Jacket), ANTI - POLITICAL PARTY is winging it's way to you!)



Anyway, back to the serious blog, I dared to enter the UK with, shock - horror, a real BRITISH passport, fuck on you real holders of real BRITISH Passports!



After living abroad for so many years and returning many times to my natural birthplace, I, St Jagged, find myself drifting further and futher into a mega - multi - culti dilemma.



I look at my natural skin and discover a pale, wrinkled, whitey - pink colour. I think back to my wonderful days of growing up in the UK (really fucking wonderful, divorced parents, father fucked off, left poor mother to care for ST. Jagged and his whitey - pinkish bruvver, well that's another blog to tell you all on another day!) and think is this really the same place?



Well geographically it is, the UK might be shrinking due to erosion and the environmental pollution, but there are certainly no whitey - pinkey people left in Napoleans shops, filling up stations, fish and chip shops, Harrods (thankyou Mohammed!), grocery stores, etc, etc.



All I see are multi - culti people from different countries, creeds, colours and religions smothering the country and growing at a rate where ST. Jagged started to think, "where are all of the whitey - pinkey people now (OK, clever shit, muvva fuckers, Poles, Czechs, Bulgarians, Rumanians, Russians, etc, are reasonably whitey - pinky of colour, St. Jagged knows that, but they certainly don't speak the same fucking lingo as St.Jagged does!) and what is happening to the whitey -pinky race that was around when St. Jagged once was a whitey -pinky, horror kid".



The TRUTH (here we go again, that fucking WORD!) is, ST. Jagged thinks we are a dying whitey - pinky race. Maybe evolution (as Darwin, the whitey - pinky evolutionist once confirmed, "only the strong will survive".) has proved Napolean correct, but with one minor (or major) fucking correction, the Brits are a nation of shopkeepers, but fuck me, they certainly ain't the same colour as they use to be!!!



Maybe St. Jagged should have listened to ALI G, when he suggested that an Apache Passport would be OK to enter the UK, Apaches are in the middle as far as colour goes (red, by the way, for all of you yellow coloured, ignorant General "last stand" Custer supporters) and I could have blended more into the present multi - culti background without feeling like a fucking stranger in my own homeland!



Please, all "NEW, so called, multi culti, BRITS", the UK is shrinking anyway so please go easy on us whitey - pinky original Brits, leave us at least some space to breath before you smother the place with all of your multi - culti colours.



OK, different colours bring pyschodelic, reggae, international and rapping vibes to the UK and whitey - pinks are pale, dull and mainly piggily - ugly. But the UK did once belong to a race of whitey - pinky shopkeepers and St.Jagged feels its a shame that the whitey - pinky ones are being rapidly sent to the whitey - pinky - piggy homes in heaven and leaving their traditions, cultures, heritages, fish and chip shops (Chinese fish and Chip shops, fuck off, what is the UK coming to), and shops in general to a new brand of multi - culti, coloured Brits.



Maybe we whitey - pinky Brits, should make a General "last Stand" Custer last stand and fight for our right to exist in our own homeland. Start a colour war and all become blue eyed, blond, albino fucking Nazi's, but that would be oh so racist, now that would'nt do, would it?



"NO ST.JAGGED, UNFORTUNATELY, IF YOU WANT TO SEE MANY MORE WHITEY - PINKY PEOPLE, YOU MUST EITHER ENTER THE REALMS OF THE PIGGY HEAVENS AND NOT VISIT YOUR HOMELAND, OR MAYBE EVEN YOU CAN JOIN THAT WHITEY - PINKY, MEGA - RICH, RATBAG, SIR RICHARD BRANSON ON ONE OF HIS JOURNEYS TO THE OUTER UNIVERSE AND BE DEVOURED BY A MASSIVE "BLACK FUCKING HOLE" (Black, who's a fucking racist, not the one and only ST.Jagged, no way!)


Devoted Jagged Edge lovers, St.Jagged begs you all, don't forget to apply for your fabulous, glossy, multi - colour info - package regarding:

THE BACK STABBING, LOONYBIN, STRAIGHT (Jacket), ANTI -POLITICAL, PARTY
(VOTE, VOTE, VOTE!!)


As you can all read a BLITZ - TRIP to the ol UK didn't do ST.Jagged much good at all, but he is convinced that with all of your support (and the mega - trillion donations of your much needed bucks, a lá Hilary and that dark coloured, whitey - pink Baraka guy) he will win the next general election and support Napolean in his statement that Britain once, really was a nation of whitey - pinky shopkeepers, a long, long time ago (fuck on you whitey - pinky, piggy, muvva fucking shopkeepers!).


Goodbye and snort, honk, snort, from ST. Jagged and his merry (whitey - pinky) shagging, snorters!

zondag 2 maart 2008

Plastic Insanity in L.A.


Dear Jagged one's, St Jagged has a problem, I've just had a fucking "lip job" and I can't sip my tea, everybody say aahh!!
No, avid and true addicts of St.Jagged masterpieces, I was only joking, but I definitly won't be giving blow jobs in the future, Gorge Michael I'm sorry, St.Jagged is straight anyway, pussies beware!!
The TRUTH (oh here we fucking go again, that word!) is, I had to suffer (St.Jaggeds spouse
wanted to see the programme but I told her, I love her the way she is and it's not necessary to have her lovely bulges removed!) an hour of watching a documentary over, guess what, braind dead arseholes in the great and wonderful metropole of L. (plastic shithole) A. in the great USA having tons of plastic shoved into their over sun - tanned, astral bodies.
Also having tons of shit (fat actually!) sucked out of their bodies because they would rather pay billions of dollars to quack, plastic surgeons than go to the gym, reduce their food intake, suffer a little bit or just accept the fact that they are just getting fucking OLD! (don't mention that word in Beverly Hills, Hollywood or the surrounding areas of the multi - millionare, super star playgrounds).
Ageing, ugly, sagging tits, drooping bums, sex handles, fatty bellies, small dicks, big noses, elephant ears, bald heads, crooked teeth, grey hair, untanned bodies, wrinkles, saggy necks, celluloid thighs, baggy chins and all of the rest of human ailments can be cured (if your wallet is FAT enough!) in the great and wonderful metropole of L.A. Bollockswood, Beverly Hills and surroundings.
The reporter filmed bent and crooked quack surgeons earning trillions of crooked bucks off of their clientel and they pathetically explained to the reporter that "they were only working for the sake of humanity".
What! fuck off you greedy, lying bastards! You're just ripping off your rich, famous and braindead clientel and filling your already overfilled plastic - sacks (oops sorry about the pun, but thinking about it, St.Jagged could do with having his plastic sacks removed from above his weary TV eyes) with even more crookedly earnt bucks.
Don't try and kid St.Jagged with your bullshit, and those brain - dead morons you have as clients should dedicate their disgusting, made - over, plastic - crap bodies to Nazi - regimes for experiments and research into developing the "Master Race" or "robot cloning", whatever!
Come on Jagged one's how pathetic are these pratts who spend trillions of bucks to satisfy thier own vain, sad and very miserable efforts to impress everybody and show - off their synthetic bodies to the rest of the world, "look at me I'm so beautiful", FUCK OFF morons!
OK, plastic surgery for those unfortunate to have damages caused by fire, disformity (the elephant man would have loved L.A.!) accidents or freaks of nature, St.Jagged has no problem at all, in fact St.Jagged supports the great work being done for these unfortunate people.
But these wannabee Schwarzenggers, Victoria (plastic tits) Beckham, Cher, Sophia Loren, Wacko Jacko (well he's really God's gift to nature and ageing gracefully, sad muvva fucker!) and the rest of the arseholes in the shiny, plastic, glamour world, paving the way forward for the rest of us "little people"to get rid of their money and shove it up the arses of these over -rich quack surgeons, all in the name of "BEAUTY", get a fucking life arseholes!
St.Jagged would rather become ugly, aged, wrinkly, grey haired, going bald, saggy arsed and satisfied that nature is taking it's natural course and living like nature intended us to.
The morons over there in "glamour land" are welcome to their tons of plastic being poked into their brainless - dead bodies and should have it all well and truly, poked right up their arses!
To grow old gracefully, live reasonably healthy, enjoy one anothers extra bulges and find the inner sanctuary of love (real love, not the plastic shit in shiny, happy holly - bollockswood) is TRUE happiness and thats what we humans should be striving for.
Silicone Valley my arse, shove pins in their silicone tits and let them smother their plasticy world with tsunamis of the crap and may they all drown happily ever after, fucking Amen.
Well my beloved and true readers, this is St.Jagged signing off from L. (fucking) A. where I'm just about to be put to sleep and have an operation to extend my dick to elephants size (they promised me, If I cant get it hard anymore they would supply me with elephant size viagra pills for the rest of my very sad life, poor wife! Also if I had problems walking with my elephant size dick, they could turn me into a giant, black, 8 foot tall basketball player, the wonders of modern surgery!!).
Goobye bye from St.Jagged and his Jagged Plastic Ono Band (ex band from John and Oko (John and Oko, ex Beatle and Japanese singing wonder, who the fuck are they!) for the younger, not yet wrinkled and grey readers of these fabulous works of superior art!)