zondag 12 oktober 2008

Elephants Crap Causes Ozonehole over India, Shock, Horror!!!

Well who the fuck is to blame for Ozone holes appearing in our once so pristine atmosphere, look above and you will find the answer.

Yes Jaggedone's, St. Jagged has been researching this subject and after studying a global scientific survey St. Jagged has come to the stinking, disgusting, polluting, stenching conclusion that farting, fucking Indian Elephants, Australian Sheep, American Cows, etc are to blame, shock fucking horror!!!!

Never in a million years are polluted factories, CO2 output, traffic jammed motorways, municipal refuse pits, stinking, disgustingly fithy human bogholes (mentioned in an earlier masterpiece from the one and only St.Jagged), nuclear wastage plants, human sewer works, chemical factories, human polluted oceans, rivers, lakes, inland seas, dead, swimming on the surface fish, etc, etc, to blame.

No my Jaggedone's, farting, crapping elephants and their animal brothers and sisters have brought upon the, oh so clean and pure human race, this inevitable disaster and DANGER from above.

They have caused the Ozone holes to appear through the accumilation of methane gases by persistently farting and crapping all over our wonderful planet and left the human race with a massive, ultra violet, infra red bombardment from our ferocious and very angry mother of all planets, the sun.

We poor, innocent and very honest, upright humans are about to be sacrificially sacriced for the sake of our farting, crapping animal contra - parts and have no solution for the problem (well maybe add a bit more pollution to their habitats, poison the muvva fuckers foods, start a global foot and mouth outbreak, destroy the forests and rain forests!!) Oh my God, St.Jagged forgot, humans eat the muvva fuckers, that won't do, we could all end up fucking killing ourselves!!!
Alternative solution:
We could all jump on the next available rocket flying towards fuck knows where and leave the "SHITHOLE" behind us (only if you're a multi -millionaire, billionaire and a good friend of Sir "ol platinum balls" Branson and a Virgin of course!).

Ozone holes caused by farting and crapping elephants (and of course those other filthy beasts, pigggies, cows, sheep shaggers) who else can the human race blame for their self inflicted miseries, our Alien friends maybe ("Aliens, oh St Jagged get a fucking life, there are no flying saucers and green men shitting and peeing down on our planet, oh, maybe it's God/Allah (no insults towards our muslim brotherhood please) is sitting on the bog having a good ol crap!!!")

St.Jaggeds innerconscience wakes up and can't stand the stench coming out of the bathroom.

Jaggedone's, goodbye from, just about to let a massive fart go, release some more methane gases in the toilet and poison the rest of the family sitting (shitting) on the bog, ST Jagged, and his ol mate WAN-KIN-DIK (filthy minded muvva fuckers!!)

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