donderdag 16 april 2009

Flirting with the competition!

Yes, Jaggedone's, ol fart, wannabee St.Jagged has been flirting with his competitiors for the right to be the Nr1 satirical site on the planet, internet, universe and even further afield (aliens fucking love St.Jagged and his ol WAN-KIN-DIK), no not Aljazeera Int, they are no competition for St.Jagged and his mighty "Truth" crusades, I mean the Spoofy ones over on!

If you can't fucking beat them, join them and St.Jagged has been sucked into their writers list offering satire at it's most fabulous and certainly nothing to do with the "TRUTH," just complete and utter bullshit! (as usual)

Anyway my devoted Jaggedone's, do not fear St.Jagged will never abandon his devoted readers (morons!) his half dead, swimming up - side - down goldfish, scabby with rabies afflicted dog and last not least, fed on pyrannahs cat called RAZOR TEETH, RAZOR SHARP PUSSY LICKER!

St.Jagged is secretly hoping to reach global popularity within 6 weeks similair to Brad Pitt (St.Jagged is prettier than Brad and Angela will certainly fall for the Elephantman lookalike once she discovers my innerconscience, fuck off innerconscience, Angelas mine!). He is currently sweeping every spoof writer aside in the popularity rankings and will soon be on his 50 million dollar contract writing a weekly column for that other fab, full of shit publication called THE SUN or THE MIRROR or THE TIMES (all owned by mega - rich Ricahrd Murdoch and all full of crap!)

Fuck me, whatever next, mansions in Hollywood, Gstaad, Berchtesgarten (Adolf and his Nazi followers beware, St.Jagged wird kommen! Deutsch for beginners, Sieg Heil and all of that!) NY, London, Milan, you name it, St.Jagged will be there and then the "TRUTH" will really begin to shake the muvva fucking world by its foundations a lá Italien earthquakes!

Oh St.Jagged forgot his ol Chinese down and out, WAN-KIN-DIK on this road to fame and fortune; fuck him, send him back to earthquake destroyed Chinky land with his cohones between his miserable, skinny, yellowy rickshaw pulling legs and don't even pay his fare, wicked St.Jagged, aaahh muy pobre slave, my ol WAN-KIN-DIK.
"St.Jagged, St.Jagged wake the fuck up, you're covered in cold sweat and ol WAN-KIN-DIK is sobbing his sorry slit eyes out because he heard you in your nightmare saying you would send him back to that non - corrupt, financially melted down shithole called China." St.Jagged's innerconscience saves the day once more and kicks the shit out of St.Jaggeds demented brain cells, throws ice cold water over his throbbing forehead (and WAN-KIN-DIK!) and St.Jagged awakens with 500000 decibles ringing between his wax filled ears (Slipknot on his MP3).

"Fuck me St.Jagged sighs, what a fucking nightmare that was," "St.Jagged rich and famous, mixing it with the high and mighty, never in a million years would ol St.Jagged abandon his Pyscho - socialist views, abandon his devoted Jaggedone's, "THE TRUTH CRUSADES," and especially not his ol throbbing, sobbing, WAN-KIN-DIK!"

St.Jagged's innerconscience peeps in, "but that bit shagging my balls off with Angela was quite pleasant wasn't it." "Fuck off innerconscience, Angela's mine!!!"

See you all soon from the very stiff WAN-KIN-DIK, innerconscience and St.Jagged of course, he was just SPOOFING around you know!!

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