dinsdag 9 juni 2009

Holland beat England in their own backyard at the ancient game of CRICKET, whatever next, Nessie will be sighted!!!

It's only fucking cricket W.G. Grace, don't turn in your grave!

Howzat, Jaggedone's, how the fuck is zat!! No oh faithful one's St.Jagged hasn't gone completely stark raving loony, but nearly!!

As if its not embarrassing enough being a very proud Brit and having to suffer the indignities that our super, overpayed, loser, sportsmen/women pour upon us, no fucking no! St.Jagged just happens to reside in Holland, that insignificant country of Shell, Van gogh, super footballers, coffee, cheese, crap rugby players and cricketers.

Wel they certainly stuffed the mother land of cricket right up their butts and had William.G. Grace turning in his very fucking ancient grave!! (see above!)

OK, Jaggedone's we all know about English footie players, they couldn't win the World/European cups even if they were given to them! ("wouldn't be fair ol chap," stiff upper lip bullshit!)

Rugby, Athletics, Boxing, Tennis, etc, you name it, the Brits are completely useless at it!

St.Jagged will now name some major (my butt!) sports where the Brits excell:

Marbles = fuck off

Darts = Only when a certain Dutchman (again!) Mijnheer Barneveld is not playing!

Fox Hunting = no other country on the planet wants to play that barbaric sport!

Hooliganism = World champions together with Poland (bunch of Skinhead morons).
World Champion hooligan "Larry the Leeds United Thug" winning the world cup final against Kraut "Boris Boom Boom Smashyourkopfin"

Kicking Old age Pensioners = three times world champions, respect muvva fuckers!!

Rowing at Henley = Only possible winners because only posh aristocrat bastards are allowed to play with themselves + champers ducky!

University boat race = Oxford (full of Yanks) Cambridge ( full of more Yanks) don't count, foreign bastards, disqualified!

Snail racing = 5 x times world champions beat the French (YES!) only because they insist on eating their best racers, failing to finish every time!
GB snail winning world championships, fuck me he's got an orange hat on, Dutch bastards!

Pitbull fighting = 10 x world champions, only US has more titles to its belt but has now been banned, all champion pitbulls smuggled into the UK, hence 5 x winners at last!

Racing cockroaches = 10 x times second behind India, reason: England taught them all they know and the fucking ex Raj bastards now beat them hands down, breeding, breeding and even more breeding! (too many cockroaches in India, what else is new!)

Anyway Jaggedone's, we once proud losing English are now praying that the fucking Krauts get stuffed by Lichtenstein at footie, then we can have a massive laugh at our old enemies:

Chance of that happening are the same as England winning the World Cup in sunny ol Zuid Afrika (+ apartheid!) 5000/1, St.Jagged is now taking bets so be fucking quick, and if England win it, St.Jagged will commit hari kari at the centre court of Wimbledon, yet another English loser!!!

Goodbye Jaggedone's, see you over at the http://www.thespoof.com/ site for more very, spooky, Jagged adventures, by the way St.Jaggeds ol Chinky slave WAN-KIN-DIK has entered the footy World Cup singlehanded, after slaughtering the ravaging Persian armies, corrupt NY CEO's, Talibans and Al Qaeda he will represent the Falkland Islands and thump the fucking English off of the planet, once and for all!!

Geen opmerkingen: