maandag 29 juni 2009

Sad days in the St.Jagged household!!!

St.Jagged entering a NHS hospital to visit his mum, St.Jagged left alive, MUM / RIP another MRSA victim !!!!
Convicted Rumanien nurse last seen working in NHS hospitals feeding dying OAP's!!
MRSA kills more OAP's than Hitler stuck in Auschwitz!!!

Sad news from the St.Jagged household, no muvva fuckers, WAN-KIN-DIK is still here and the rest of St.Jaggeds faithful readership, his upside down swimming, dead goldfish, mingy dog and flea-ridden, non-corrupt, non-voting Persian/Iranian cat!

No Jaggedone's St.Jagged has lost a very dear person and she is now in the safe hands of another very dear member of the Jagged family flying freely somewhere between our shithole planet and wherever they want to be "Two little birds"

Anyway whilst going through the ordeal of losing this very dear person St.Jagged was confronted with several not so pleasant TRUTHS regarding GB, NHS Hospitals and to get rid of all of the frustrations St.Jagged wrote a couple of poignant Spoofs over at the site.

They are coming up below and if any one of you has lost a close relative lately, my deepest condolonces go out to you all!!!

Enjoy the Spoofs, smile, laugh, but also spare a thought for all of those reaching the end of their lives in hospitals, especially OAP's. In this modern day and age they are not being treated with the respect that they deserve and St.Jagged hopes that his satirical spoofs will at least ring a few bells!!!

Spoof 1)

The very cheapskate NHS has been rocked once more by an even bigger scandal than their recently reported cheap foreigner employment policies! What could be worse? MRSA, the killer bug, which takes care of more OAP's than Hitler ever did at Auschwitz!

News has leaked (at a very leaky NHS!) out from CEO boardrooms that the killer MRSA bug is not quite what OAP punters forced into NHS hospitals think it is, an unavoidable KILLER! A recent infiltration exercise by the intrepid CIA (cockroach infiltration army) has found evidence that the MRSA bug was purposely released in hospitals to drastically cut costs, waiting lists, save beds and increase CEO bonuses!OAP's, especially the female species, delivered into hospital with a simple broken leg, arm, toe or finger have been increasingly exiting the backdoors in coffins. Good business for the hospitals, funeral parlours and great news for the LABOUR GOVERNMENT!

The very brave CIA reporter, "King-Roach Pussywound" also infected by the MRSA bug after licking the blood of a MRSA infested dying OAP, (luvely, jubbely!) sent this very disturbing and shocking report over to CIA headquarters:
Dr.Death (better known as that rat, NHS, CEO, Boris Genocidski) divulged at a board meeting with his lesser DR.Deaths the superb figures for 2008/09.
"After the introduction of MRSA we are pleased to announce that especially OAP's are "popping off" with rapid haste! Everbody is profiting, Funeral Directors, the Labour Government, CEO's and also, NHS costs have been slashed by 35%."
"This means we can all pay ourselves even larger bonuses and kid the world that we and the Labour Party are all doing a fucking grand job!"

CIA reporter "King-Roach Pussywound" just managed to relay this horrendous report before being trod on by a certain CEO with his handmade designer 400,00 pound shoes, spreading puss all over the pristine polished oak floor and finally being put out of his misery.

The unnamed CEO cynically laughed and quoted:"Well this mother fucker certainly reminds me of our OAP customers and their relatives downstairs, who don't have a fucking idea about our murderous, deadly MRSA policies."
Thank God "King-Roach Pussywound" had the brains to leave his hidden microphone on: Jaggedone and his CIA reporters have sworn to "get the Mother fuckers!!!"

For further developments keep tuned to Aljazeera International, they at least sometimes attempt to reveal the TRUTH!

Spoof 2)

The latest scandal to rock the NHS and Labour Party has been reported and exclusively divulged via Jaggedone's CIA (Cockroach Infiltration Army) to the world after an investigation into racist Hospital employment practices. CIA special health and medical reporter, Daddy "Filthylonglegs" Unwashedhands, sent the following, harrowing report back to CIA headquarters after creeping through the disgusting bog pipes of a certain mortuary in a certain hospital and uncovered the following racist facts:

a)No white or Brit nurses were to be found working in any of the departments.
b)All "Daddy" could hear was the mumbo-jumboing of African/foreign nurses and Doctors in pigeon English whilst talking to their Brit patients/relatives, who couldn't understand a fucking word what they were on about!
c)Only in the CEO/Management departments was decipherable English being spoken and white caucasian faces detected.
d)After scouring through "Top Secret" documents, "Daddy" found the following documented criteria pertaining to employment conditions, here we go:
1) No white, British applicants will have a chance of employment in the NHS, they should all fuck off to America!
2) Only coloured/non-Brit white i.e. Polish, Rumanien, etc shall be given opportunities of employement in the NHS, reasons: They're cheap, nasty and don't give a shit about patients/relatives feelings, hence no more time consuming emotional bullshit and an immense cutting of time and costs!
3)By employing non-Brits we the NHS have cut waiting lists to a minimum and nobody has noticed that the services on offer are appalling (apart from white, caucasian dying OAP's who are rapidly vacating their beds, ask yourself why!).
4)NHS CEO's and Management and will remain solely in British hands, hence the justification to pay enormously, inflationary salaries. White Brit nurses/doctors are planning protests and strikes, but the NHS don't give a shit because they have the backing of the Labour Party and their white caucasian Prime Minister, real Scot, Gordon Brown, who believes in racial equality as long as he doesn't have to be treated at NHS shitholes!!

Daddy "filthylonglegs" Unwashedhands scarpered out of this certain hospital and relayed this shocking report back to CIA headquarters who in turn has sent it post-haste to the All-Black, Notting Hill Carnaval Organisation Commitee. They have promised to build a protest float in honour of the unemployed, white, Brit caucasian nurses and doctors as a show of solidarity and proof that RACISM ISN'T DEAD BY NO MEANS, MAAN!!

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